Somewhere, someone is insipidly singing "Getting To Know You..."

Well hello, welcome, bonjour, hola, oota goota Solo? and every other ridiculous greeting that you could come up with.

...oh, who am I kiddng, you're no more amused by the feigned cheekiness than I am here, so let's forego it, shall we?

Anyways, welcome to the open seats of the Third Row.

...mostly open, anyways. No matter how early you get there, there always seems to be one kind of sarcastic bastard with a foul mouth nitpicking on something or other in the film.

Am I that person? Possible, although highly unlikely. Still, for the sake of this blog, I'd like believe I'll do my best to fill in that role.

So what can you expect from this place?

Well, initially the idea had started as just standard reviews. Then I got a good look at RottenTomatoes, and came to the conclusion that the field of standard review had become...well...to use the phrase 'saturated' would be a gross understatement. Basically, it's come to the point where, in the wonders of the new blog age, prettymuch anyone can ply themselves as a legit critic (and I point to this site as exhibit a.)

So, with the field of standard review ripe and fit to burst, the next logical answer became to move into the niche fields. This can also be fun, don't get me wrong, in fact, more often than not some of the stuff that will get reviewed here will be anything from the strange, the obscure (and semi-obscure,) the outright craptacular, and occasionally we'll get a respectable cult film in here too.

Along with these...partially for when I feel like acting like a cantankerous old geezer, and in part if I can't find any particuarly good/bad titles to roast over the coals, we'll have some generally just good old fashioned discussion on film in general. Particular trends, aspects of it, bizarre outlandish doomsday prophecies for the industry, all that fun stuff...

...so yeah, hopefully if you stick with this, we're gonna have some fun here.

...I notice some of you seem to be nervously backing away to another row. That's fine, come on back some time, always room in the third row!